Welcome to Dog Shit Lane - a small Somerset allotment where the vegetables grow, the gossip grows faster, and common sense rarely survives the first cup of tea.
On paper, it is just an allotment behind Chilton Street in Bridgwater. In reality, it is a republic of sheds, runner beans, foxes, family legends and men with very strong opinions about things nobody asked them to fix. At the centre of it all is Alfie, trying to enjoy retirement, grow a few vegetables and maintain a peaceful plot. Unfortunately, peace is in short supply when your greenhouse has been reclassified as an Airbnb, your pergola has been annexed by Phil, your runner beans have entered the family supply chain, and half the allotment believes Dave may secretly own most of Somerset.
What follows is a warm, funny and affectionate journey through the everyday madness of allotment life and family folklore. There is Alan, cursed with responsibility and a tape measure. Dave, whose Somerset wisdom is almost impossible to translate but usually correct. Ben, whose plot operates somewhere between horticulture and archaeology. Phil, who can turn sitting down into a lifestyle and somehow attracts pigeons, cider cans and strange second-hand objects. Then there is the family: Mandy, Sharon, Pat, Julie, Jamie, Linda, the grandchildren and the unforgettable memory of Gerry, whose phrase "NFB - Normal For Bridgwater" explains almost everything while explaining absolutely nothing.
Told with observational humour, warmth and a sharp eye for the ridiculous, Dog Shit Lane is a celebration of the people, places and stories that make ordinary life extraordinary. It is about allotments, family, ageing, memory, grandchildren, gossip, food, foxes, laughter and the strange comfort of belonging somewhere that makes no sense to outsiders but feels exactly like home to everyone inside it.
If you enjoy character-led British humour, family storytelling, rural eccentricity and the quiet comedy of everyday life, pull up a chair under the pergola.
Just don't sit in Phil's.
