I used to think he was deep. I thought he had layers. I thought if I just kept peeling back the defensiveness and the silence, I'd find the love I deserved.
I was wrong.
He wasn't a loving prince. He was an onion. And the only thing I got from peeling him was a lot of tears and a stink that wouldn't wash off.
Stop peeling back his layers, hoping to find a Prince. You're just going to cry, and he's still going to be an onion.Do you feel like the "Project Manager of Intimacy" in your relationship? Are you exhausted from trying to teach a grown man how to identify a feeling? Do you express your heart, only to be met with a blank stare, a "logical" solution you didn't ask for, or the classic: "I just don't know what you want me to say"?
You aren't crazy. You aren't nagging. You are just starving for connection in a house full of emotional crumbs.
For 18 years, I lived with a "Fixer." I thought if I just explained myself better, if I just found the right metaphor, he would finally hear me. I thought he was deep and stoic-a man of many layers.
I was wrong. He wasn't deep. He was an Onion. And the only thing I got from peeling back those layers was 18 years of tears and a stink that wouldn't wash off.
I'm A Queen Who Deserves Cake is the manifesto for every woman who is done crying over men who won't listen. It is a guide to surviving "Weaponized Incompetence," de-programming the "Cult of Toughness," and reclaiming your sanity without saying a word.
Inside, you'll learn:
- The 30-Second Pause: The one tool that stops the "Mr. Fix-It" train in its tracks and forces him to actually listen (or exposes him as a lost cause).
- The "Sandra" Standard: Why you need a partner who can listen to you vent about your nemesis at work without trying to offer a strategy.
- Customer Service Mode: How to protect your energy when dealing with an emotional brick wall.
- Raising Boys Who Aren't Assholes: A brutally honest guide to ensuring your son doesn't grow up to be an Onion.
- The Difference Between a Pearl and a Swine: How to stop casting your expensive vulnerability before men who will just trample it in the mud.
This isn't a book about how to "save" your marriage by working harder. This is a book about how to save yourself by doing absolutely nothing.
Put down the onion. You deserve the cake.
